Today has been an uneventful day really. I haven’t done much and to be honest, I didn’t go to church this morning. I meant to, but for some reason I slept in yet again. I think I am to the point in my life that I am trying to do so much during the week that by the time Sunday comes around I really am just worn out. I hate that, but that is my excuse for now.
I don’t feel as guilty this Sunday as I did last Sunday, but I have been feeling really convicted lately about a lot of things in my life; one of those things is not going to church. I won’t bore you with all those details, but basically I am really hoping that I can learn to be more righteous. That word is scary to me, but I really want to become the “best” (to use our word from the last blog) person I can be. Righteous, according to Merriam-Webster, actually means “acting in accord with divine or moral law: free from guilt or sin.” Now, the second part of that definition is what is most interesting to me.
In particular the word “free” sounds so good. I can’t help but think of all the things I would like to be free from: sickness, debt, guilt, etc. I mean, to be free really means to not have to worry about, right? If I am free from it, then I don’t have to think about it. The reality of life is that things continue to pop up in all our lives that we have to worry about: bills, eating, for some of us parents, etc. But here’s the thing, when these “things” in our life begin to weigh us down or become something we are worrying about, we are to take it to Jesus.
In Mark 1:40 a guy walks up to Jesus who has leprosy. Now, I am sure many of you know this already, but leprosy is something that in that day and time you couldn’t get rid of. It was a disease that there was no cure for. Now, there are some diseases even today that have no cure, but for the most part, I think we can look at this disease as something in our own life that we can’t seem to shake. For example, any addiction that we have could be seen as something similar to leprosy, although leprosy is definitely not an addiction.
I think what is so great about this story is that this guy actually believes that Jesus can heal him from his disease. Even greater is that upon him going to Jesus, the Scripture says that Jesus had compassion and healed him. I don’t know what all you all deal with, but I do know this, we can take our junk to Jesus, leave it, and Jesus will free us.
The only way I can become righteous is to be free. How do I become righteous? I have to go to Jesus and let Him mold me and make me into someone like Him, free of guilt and sin.
To be completely honest, I don’t really know how all that works, but I know it does. The more I pursue Christ, the more I am convicted, and then the more I am freed when I just give it to Him. I know it is hard to give things to God. Trust me, I know. I struggle with that all the time. But if this Scripture is saying anything at all to me, it is that Jesus is compassionate and wants to free us all from whatever makes us sick. For this guy, it was leprosy. For me and you, it may be selfishness, pride, cancer, or whatever.
As we continue to push forward in life, let’s give the things that worry us to Jesus. In doing so, we will become free. Better yet, we will be on our way to becoming righteous.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Momma knows best?
Recently, it seems that most of the people I have talked to are looking for some sort of direction in their life. Last night I was at a friend’s house for awhile, and the majority of my time there we talked about what we hoped to accomplish in 2008 and beyond. Not necessarily looking at New Year’s resolutions, but thinking about life in the big picture; like long term future. My friends are around 30, and so most of the time we end our conversations with the saying, “well, we aren’t getting any younger!” You know, that’s not only true for me and my buddies, but that’s true for everyone.
Each year whether we like it or not, and trust me I don’t like it, we get older. I like looking at pictures of me and my family and as I was home over the holidays I walked around the house looking at all the pictures my parents had plastered all over the walls and that were sitting on desks and tables. When I am sitting around the house bored, I also like to check out different people’s blogs to see what is going on in their life or at least their head, see their pictures, and if I am still bored, I catch myself looking at all my friend’s pictures on facebook and myspace. Now, I say all this to say that the only thing that is constant, other than me being addicted to looking at pictures, is that everyone is getting older.
As we get older it becomes easy to start comparing what we have to what others around us our same age has, and sometimes even get angry that we aren’t further along in our life than we see them being. So what do we do, or maybe I should say what do I do? I start worrying about the direction I should be going in my life to catch up with them or if it is someone I feel in competition with, pass them in the materialistic category. I don’t know if Jesus ever compared Himself to the people around Him (I doubt it), but it seems as though He searched and pondered where He was to go next on His journey or ministry. All through the Gospels, Jesus goes to God in prayer before making decisions on where to go next or what to do, and where we come to today in Mark there is no difference. In Mark 1:35-39, Jesus wakes up early, goes and prays, and then tells the disciples that they are all going to the next town together. I can’t help but laugh at this and picture all the disciples cheering that they are about to go on a fun trip…. Can’t you hear them yelling road trip?!
What has to grab our attention though is that Jesus seemed to be so confident that God would point Him in the right direction, He not only went far away from his friends to make sure He didn’t get distracted by them wanting something, but He stayed in prayer until He was satisfied with the outcome. I don’t know how long that was, because Scripture doesn’t tell us, but it was long enough that the disciples got worried about Him, and He was clear and certain that He was to leave Capernaum. Now, I love to pray, and I feel like I pray all the time, but my prayers seem to be pretty short. I get straight to the point, then I say Amen and I am done. Maybe what I am trying to say here is that I don’t really take the time to listen for God to always give me direction; I talk, but I don’t let God.
I say this all the time, but it’s hard for me to admit that I can’t do everything on my own. I really want to be able to make decisions, go and make it happen, and then be able to say look what I have done. And I do that unfortunately more than I should, but usually when I am saying look at what I have done, it is prefaced with the words “uh-oh.” Why? Because alone, I make decisions that are selfish and based on what I think is best. I don’t know how you make decisions or what goes into your decision making, but if we believe Scripture and accept it as the authority then we know that God sees the big picture so to speak. Therefore, why wouldn’t we go to Him, seeking His advice on what to do and where to go, knowing that since He sees everything He would obviously know best.
The difficulty comes then in staying in conversation with God long enough to hear Him answer. I know the days get long and busy, but the older I get the more I realize that my life would be much easier and less stressful if I only had to do things once. Instead of trying my way the first 15 times before I let God give it a try, I think I am going to try and let God start helping me with my decisions first. After-all, if He knows best (and not your momma), then why wouldn’t anyone want to do anything that isn’t the “best” first?
As the New Year approaches, I truly wish us all the best! But for that to happen, we all have to make sure we seek the answers from the One that knows best. Guess I am going to need to listen a little bit more... How about you?
Each year whether we like it or not, and trust me I don’t like it, we get older. I like looking at pictures of me and my family and as I was home over the holidays I walked around the house looking at all the pictures my parents had plastered all over the walls and that were sitting on desks and tables. When I am sitting around the house bored, I also like to check out different people’s blogs to see what is going on in their life or at least their head, see their pictures, and if I am still bored, I catch myself looking at all my friend’s pictures on facebook and myspace. Now, I say all this to say that the only thing that is constant, other than me being addicted to looking at pictures, is that everyone is getting older.
As we get older it becomes easy to start comparing what we have to what others around us our same age has, and sometimes even get angry that we aren’t further along in our life than we see them being. So what do we do, or maybe I should say what do I do? I start worrying about the direction I should be going in my life to catch up with them or if it is someone I feel in competition with, pass them in the materialistic category. I don’t know if Jesus ever compared Himself to the people around Him (I doubt it), but it seems as though He searched and pondered where He was to go next on His journey or ministry. All through the Gospels, Jesus goes to God in prayer before making decisions on where to go next or what to do, and where we come to today in Mark there is no difference. In Mark 1:35-39, Jesus wakes up early, goes and prays, and then tells the disciples that they are all going to the next town together. I can’t help but laugh at this and picture all the disciples cheering that they are about to go on a fun trip…. Can’t you hear them yelling road trip?!
What has to grab our attention though is that Jesus seemed to be so confident that God would point Him in the right direction, He not only went far away from his friends to make sure He didn’t get distracted by them wanting something, but He stayed in prayer until He was satisfied with the outcome. I don’t know how long that was, because Scripture doesn’t tell us, but it was long enough that the disciples got worried about Him, and He was clear and certain that He was to leave Capernaum. Now, I love to pray, and I feel like I pray all the time, but my prayers seem to be pretty short. I get straight to the point, then I say Amen and I am done. Maybe what I am trying to say here is that I don’t really take the time to listen for God to always give me direction; I talk, but I don’t let God.
I say this all the time, but it’s hard for me to admit that I can’t do everything on my own. I really want to be able to make decisions, go and make it happen, and then be able to say look what I have done. And I do that unfortunately more than I should, but usually when I am saying look at what I have done, it is prefaced with the words “uh-oh.” Why? Because alone, I make decisions that are selfish and based on what I think is best. I don’t know how you make decisions or what goes into your decision making, but if we believe Scripture and accept it as the authority then we know that God sees the big picture so to speak. Therefore, why wouldn’t we go to Him, seeking His advice on what to do and where to go, knowing that since He sees everything He would obviously know best.
The difficulty comes then in staying in conversation with God long enough to hear Him answer. I know the days get long and busy, but the older I get the more I realize that my life would be much easier and less stressful if I only had to do things once. Instead of trying my way the first 15 times before I let God give it a try, I think I am going to try and let God start helping me with my decisions first. After-all, if He knows best (and not your momma), then why wouldn’t anyone want to do anything that isn’t the “best” first?
As the New Year approaches, I truly wish us all the best! But for that to happen, we all have to make sure we seek the answers from the One that knows best. Guess I am going to need to listen a little bit more... How about you?
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Merry Christmas!
I have to say, that as much as I thought my parents wouldn’t let me get some sleep this Christmas, I have slept like a baby over the past few days. This morning my parents did wake me up however so we could share presents before the rest of the family came over for breakfast. That has been a little tradition of ours for a long time now, and it is kind of nice to see everyone on Christmas day.
There are still some people over here at my parent’s house talking in the sunroom and putting together a puzzle (another tradition around the Costner house each Christmas). It is kind of fun to hear them all out there enjoying each other. For that matter, I absolutely love it when everyone comes over and gets together to talk about what’s going on in their lives. It usually is just family and some really close friends, but nothing beats a good party where I can converse about sports, politics, and theological stuff (I love talking about the Scriptures!).
This morning when everyone was sitting around the table, my grandmother said jokingly that she had a request, and that was for my mom to continue this tradition more than just once a year. Although she was half-way joking, I began thinking about what she was saying. She wasn’t meaning why don’t we celebrate Jesus’ birth more than one day a year, but I guess I want to pose the question, why not? Why don’t we celebrate Jesus’ birth, death, and resurrection more than just once or twice a year, if we count Easter? Outside of those two holidays there aren’t that many holidays where the community seems to come together to celebrate.
As I began reading in Mark a little bit ago, I got to where Jesus had healed Simon’s mother-in-law, and where the town people began bringing the sick to see Jesus in hopes of their friends and family being healed from their sickness. In verse 33, the Scripture says that “The whole town was assembled at the door.” I can’t help but picture almost a Thanksgiving/Christmas/Easter party being held at this house Jesus was staying in. The truth is that Jesus was there, and by default, a crowd gathered.
I don’t know exactly why this happened, but for some reason the people in this town placed on Jesus an authority to lead them, even though they didn’t really know Him. They trusted Him not only with their life, but with their families and friends lives. Maybe they didn’t fully trust Him, but they were desperate enough for healing in their own life that they were willing to give Jesus a chance. I can’t help but think how desperate I really am and have been for Jesus to be in my life. I don’t know how you all are with your relationship with Jesus, but I have to ask Him to be in my life every day. Not that I want to copy and paste another song in this blog, but I truly feel like Annie S. Hawks who wrote the song, I Need Thee (Jesus) Every Hour.
It is so interesting to me how literally the whole town showed up to see this man Jesus. I wonder if they were desperate like me. It’s almost like by His mere presence people would come to find Him. From this very short story of Jesus in Capernaum I am overwhelmed at how the crowd gathered, and then the crowd was healed. What would happen if we celebrated Jesus more than one or two days a year? What would happen if our church services actually began to be celebrations that our Lord has come and will come again?
There are so many people in the World who doesn’t know Christ, and I understand that all won’t come to know Him. But here’s the thing, if we truly celebrated Christ and truly lived a life of celebration that we can overcome with Christ, I can’t help but believe that the crowd would gather, and then the crowd would be healed. At the name of Jesus, the one we supposedly celebrate today, mountains bow down, the blind see, the deaf hear, people rise to life, the lepers become clean, and demons shutter.
I’m not big on making promises I can’t keep, but I hope that I can live the rest of this year, the next, and so forth, living a life that celebrates Christ. In doing so, I believe that not only will I see a difference in my own life, but I think people will come to find a Jesus that will make a difference in theirs. Merry Christmas again! Now quit reading this and go and celebrate!!!
There are still some people over here at my parent’s house talking in the sunroom and putting together a puzzle (another tradition around the Costner house each Christmas). It is kind of fun to hear them all out there enjoying each other. For that matter, I absolutely love it when everyone comes over and gets together to talk about what’s going on in their lives. It usually is just family and some really close friends, but nothing beats a good party where I can converse about sports, politics, and theological stuff (I love talking about the Scriptures!).
This morning when everyone was sitting around the table, my grandmother said jokingly that she had a request, and that was for my mom to continue this tradition more than just once a year. Although she was half-way joking, I began thinking about what she was saying. She wasn’t meaning why don’t we celebrate Jesus’ birth more than one day a year, but I guess I want to pose the question, why not? Why don’t we celebrate Jesus’ birth, death, and resurrection more than just once or twice a year, if we count Easter? Outside of those two holidays there aren’t that many holidays where the community seems to come together to celebrate.
As I began reading in Mark a little bit ago, I got to where Jesus had healed Simon’s mother-in-law, and where the town people began bringing the sick to see Jesus in hopes of their friends and family being healed from their sickness. In verse 33, the Scripture says that “The whole town was assembled at the door.” I can’t help but picture almost a Thanksgiving/Christmas/Easter party being held at this house Jesus was staying in. The truth is that Jesus was there, and by default, a crowd gathered.
I don’t know exactly why this happened, but for some reason the people in this town placed on Jesus an authority to lead them, even though they didn’t really know Him. They trusted Him not only with their life, but with their families and friends lives. Maybe they didn’t fully trust Him, but they were desperate enough for healing in their own life that they were willing to give Jesus a chance. I can’t help but think how desperate I really am and have been for Jesus to be in my life. I don’t know how you all are with your relationship with Jesus, but I have to ask Him to be in my life every day. Not that I want to copy and paste another song in this blog, but I truly feel like Annie S. Hawks who wrote the song, I Need Thee (Jesus) Every Hour.
It is so interesting to me how literally the whole town showed up to see this man Jesus. I wonder if they were desperate like me. It’s almost like by His mere presence people would come to find Him. From this very short story of Jesus in Capernaum I am overwhelmed at how the crowd gathered, and then the crowd was healed. What would happen if we celebrated Jesus more than one or two days a year? What would happen if our church services actually began to be celebrations that our Lord has come and will come again?
There are so many people in the World who doesn’t know Christ, and I understand that all won’t come to know Him. But here’s the thing, if we truly celebrated Christ and truly lived a life of celebration that we can overcome with Christ, I can’t help but believe that the crowd would gather, and then the crowd would be healed. At the name of Jesus, the one we supposedly celebrate today, mountains bow down, the blind see, the deaf hear, people rise to life, the lepers become clean, and demons shutter.
I’m not big on making promises I can’t keep, but I hope that I can live the rest of this year, the next, and so forth, living a life that celebrates Christ. In doing so, I believe that not only will I see a difference in my own life, but I think people will come to find a Jesus that will make a difference in theirs. Merry Christmas again! Now quit reading this and go and celebrate!!!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Meeting Jesus in the sunroom
I’m at home now in North Carolina for Christmas. My dad was leading a musical at his church today, with my mom singing a solo, and your boy (me!) slept in by accident. I kept looking at my phone to see what time it was, and to my dismay it never turned over to Eastern Time. I thought I got a better phone when I supposedly upgraded, but my last phone would do that automatically, and this one doesn’t! Oh well.
It was somewhat refreshing to not go though. I really needed some quiet time. I had some of that yesterday in my old truck as I was driving down the road to home, but for the most part I was on the phone. Unfortunately, I don’t think I will have a lot of quiet time the rest of my trip home either. My parents like to give me all sorts of things to do while I am here, like seeing a lot of the people around home, etc. I like doing all that, but sometimes I just need some quiet time.
While I was sitting here this morning after getting ready for the day, I started reading my Scripture. I started back in Mark 1:25 where I briefly mentioned the other day in my last blog, and I couldn’t stop reading it. In this particular verse Jesus is talking to the unclean spirit in this man’s body. I couldn’t help but stop and think about my “unclean spirits.” I guess if I was going to list a couple of them out really quick it would be my pride, selfishness, neediness, and trust me I could go on and on. With all that said, I started thinking about this exorcism story and my life.
What would happen if Jesus walked up to me and saw through me, seeing all the unclean spirits that are in my life? What would happen if I asked Him to heal me? This morning in my best way possible, I have tried to bring myself to Jesus. In some sort of weird mysterious way I have pictured Jesus here in this sunroom with me this morning healing me of my unclean spirits. I know this sounds really silly, but I have needed it. I have needed to be freed from some of the things that tend to weigh me down and discourage me (a lot of people tend to call these things chains in our life).
Sometimes it seems to me like all that I can really think about in my life when it pertains to God are all these mess-ups, or chains, that are in my life. I don’t know about you, but I feel like every time I do something good or want to do something good I think of when I blew it the last time. If you are anything like me then you have a lot of mess-ups in your life, and you often let those things define who you are and limit what you can do for God.
The truth is the devil wants us to think of all the things we have done in our lives that would make us feel unworthy of anything God has to offer or wants to do in our lives. Well, we are unworthy, but that doesn’t mean that God can’t and won’t use us. I think that is one of the great things about Christ; that He is so great, He can actually use someone like me and you to fulfill His purpose. That is pretty encouraging to me, however, that doesn’t mean that the devil won’t be trying to discourage us along the way.
I have to say that this morning was a huge help for me. I needed to meet Jesus. I needed to lay it all out again and say “here it is God.” I needed to be reminded that I don’t have to carry all the weight of my burdens. Now, I know that to some degree that doesn’t make sense and I don’t fully understand it either, but I can definitely say that this morning I felt a little bit lighter. I guess it is safe to say that I felt forgiven.
I don’t know where you all are, but in verse 27, only two verses down, the Scripture reminds us that “He (meaning Jesus) commands even the unclean spirits, and they obey Him.” Whatever your “unclean spirits” are (anger, hurt, pride, fornication, abuse, etc.), I urge you to take them to Jesus. Jesus can and will free us from all the junk in our pasts and in our present. No matter what you have dealt with or are dealing with now, Jesus came to save you from it. Period. Take it to Jesus.
Travis Cottrell wrote a song entitled Jesus Saves (You should listen to it at http://www.myspace.com/traviscottrellministries). Anyway, the lyrics to the song are this…
Hear the heart of heaven beating, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, And the hush of mercy breathing, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, Hear the host of Angels sing, Glory to the new-born king, and the sounding joy repeating, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves. See the Humblest hearts adore him. And the wisest bow before him. See the sky alive with praise, melting darkness in its blaze. There is light forevermore in Jesus Saves. He will live our sorrow sharing. He will die our burden bearing. “It is done!” will shout the cross, Christ has paid redemption’s cost! While the empty tomb’s declaring, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves. Freedom’s calling, chains are falling, hope is dawning bright and true. Day is breaking, night is quaking, God is making all things new. Oh to grace, how great a debtor, Are the saint’s who shout together. Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves. Rising up so fast and strong, lifting up salvation’s song, the redeemed will sing forever, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves.
It was somewhat refreshing to not go though. I really needed some quiet time. I had some of that yesterday in my old truck as I was driving down the road to home, but for the most part I was on the phone. Unfortunately, I don’t think I will have a lot of quiet time the rest of my trip home either. My parents like to give me all sorts of things to do while I am here, like seeing a lot of the people around home, etc. I like doing all that, but sometimes I just need some quiet time.
While I was sitting here this morning after getting ready for the day, I started reading my Scripture. I started back in Mark 1:25 where I briefly mentioned the other day in my last blog, and I couldn’t stop reading it. In this particular verse Jesus is talking to the unclean spirit in this man’s body. I couldn’t help but stop and think about my “unclean spirits.” I guess if I was going to list a couple of them out really quick it would be my pride, selfishness, neediness, and trust me I could go on and on. With all that said, I started thinking about this exorcism story and my life.
What would happen if Jesus walked up to me and saw through me, seeing all the unclean spirits that are in my life? What would happen if I asked Him to heal me? This morning in my best way possible, I have tried to bring myself to Jesus. In some sort of weird mysterious way I have pictured Jesus here in this sunroom with me this morning healing me of my unclean spirits. I know this sounds really silly, but I have needed it. I have needed to be freed from some of the things that tend to weigh me down and discourage me (a lot of people tend to call these things chains in our life).
Sometimes it seems to me like all that I can really think about in my life when it pertains to God are all these mess-ups, or chains, that are in my life. I don’t know about you, but I feel like every time I do something good or want to do something good I think of when I blew it the last time. If you are anything like me then you have a lot of mess-ups in your life, and you often let those things define who you are and limit what you can do for God.
The truth is the devil wants us to think of all the things we have done in our lives that would make us feel unworthy of anything God has to offer or wants to do in our lives. Well, we are unworthy, but that doesn’t mean that God can’t and won’t use us. I think that is one of the great things about Christ; that He is so great, He can actually use someone like me and you to fulfill His purpose. That is pretty encouraging to me, however, that doesn’t mean that the devil won’t be trying to discourage us along the way.
I have to say that this morning was a huge help for me. I needed to meet Jesus. I needed to lay it all out again and say “here it is God.” I needed to be reminded that I don’t have to carry all the weight of my burdens. Now, I know that to some degree that doesn’t make sense and I don’t fully understand it either, but I can definitely say that this morning I felt a little bit lighter. I guess it is safe to say that I felt forgiven.
I don’t know where you all are, but in verse 27, only two verses down, the Scripture reminds us that “He (meaning Jesus) commands even the unclean spirits, and they obey Him.” Whatever your “unclean spirits” are (anger, hurt, pride, fornication, abuse, etc.), I urge you to take them to Jesus. Jesus can and will free us from all the junk in our pasts and in our present. No matter what you have dealt with or are dealing with now, Jesus came to save you from it. Period. Take it to Jesus.
Travis Cottrell wrote a song entitled Jesus Saves (You should listen to it at http://www.myspace.com/traviscottrellministries). Anyway, the lyrics to the song are this…
Hear the heart of heaven beating, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, And the hush of mercy breathing, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves, Hear the host of Angels sing, Glory to the new-born king, and the sounding joy repeating, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves. See the Humblest hearts adore him. And the wisest bow before him. See the sky alive with praise, melting darkness in its blaze. There is light forevermore in Jesus Saves. He will live our sorrow sharing. He will die our burden bearing. “It is done!” will shout the cross, Christ has paid redemption’s cost! While the empty tomb’s declaring, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves. Freedom’s calling, chains are falling, hope is dawning bright and true. Day is breaking, night is quaking, God is making all things new. Oh to grace, how great a debtor, Are the saint’s who shout together. Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves. Rising up so fast and strong, lifting up salvation’s song, the redeemed will sing forever, Jesus Saves, Jesus Saves.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Crying Out
I have to admit to you that I am a sensitive dude, and since life is hard stuff, then I tend to drop a few tears every now and again. I just can’t help it. I feel like everywhere I turn I hear story after story of people’s lives being hard and their hearts hurting, and that bothers me. I seemingly don’t know how to do or watch anything and not attach feelings. If I take the time to talk to someone then I become attached to some extent. I begin praying for that person, and caring about what happens in their life. I know it sounds silly to some extent, and not that I care to the extent you may be thinking, but I at least hope and want good things for the people I meet and talk to.
The thing I get most teary eyed over though is when I start talking about my life and family and God’s interaction with all that. As much as I get angry and annoyed at my family, I love them. No, I’m crazy about them. They are my support, and they love me no matter how much I screw up. I know what you’re thinking, that I seem like a big cry-baby, but I’m really not. I can drop a tear, but I’m not a cry baby.
If anything I think it is good to show emotion. Obviously there can be a point where it is too much emotion and sensitivity, but for the most part, I think it is great when someone can show emotions or at least passion about something. In my defense, I can’t imagine living life and knowing Christ and not at least getting emotional about that. If anything we should be in tears daily for what Christ has done for all of us. After all, Christ death is what brings us to the point that we can face God at all.
No wonder the demon in Mark 1:23-24 cried out to God and said leave us alone. Not only did the demon know Christ and want to live and dwell in the man in the synagogue, but commentators (people who know everything about the Scripture) say that the “us” the demon refers to is all the demons because the demon in the story knew that Jesus can completely wipe every demon out. Isn’t that interesting? The demon cried out to God to basically “save” him and the rest of the demons from Christ. The problem for the demon was that he wanted to be saved, but he didn’t want to follow. So Jesus showed no remorse in verse 25.
I can’t help but think of all the junk in my life and how I cry out for Christ to save me from it but sometimes nothing really happens. This Scripture makes me really think hard about my desires as a Christian. I mean, do I want to be saved, but I am not willing to give up my issues? Isn’t that basically what the demon was wrestling with? He wanted to be saved, but he didn’t really want to turn from what he was doing wrong; making the body he dwelled in become whole.
I was talking with a friend last night who was talking about all the things in his life that he has pursued: women, jobs, money, playing on the lake, etc. but the one thing he never had really pursued until recent was being righteous. What my friend was basically saying is that he wasn’t just going to ask Jesus to “save” him anymore; he wanted Jesus to change him. You know, that is what I want too. I don’t want to just be saved, I want to be changed. I don’t want to be like the demon who knows Christ, I want to be like the one who follows Christ leaving all that "was and is" behind.
As I sit here on my bed, freezing I might add, I can’t help but drop a few more tears. I’m so tired of being “that” guy. You know, the one who acts like he has it all together but doesn’t. The fact of the matter is as much stuff as I feel like I deal with and have dealt with, etc. Christ came to give me peace and hope. He came to give you the same. Whatever you are dealing with, whatever seems to be heavy on your heart now, Christ didn’t just come to save you from it; He came to heal you from it. You don’t have to go to Him, He came to you. So cry out! Christ is there…
One of my favorite bands, Third Day wrote a song, entitled Cry Out To Jesus. It get's me every time, if you know what I mean. Listen to it, (or read it at http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/thirdday/cryouttojesus.html), buy it, and go see them in concert (they are out with Jars of Clay right now)! Here’s their link… http://www.thirdday.com/
Are we still in this together? I don't believe anybody can change on their own. I really don't. We have to have each other and we have to have Christ. Since Christ is already here, I guess I am trying to say, I am here too. See you all soon.
The thing I get most teary eyed over though is when I start talking about my life and family and God’s interaction with all that. As much as I get angry and annoyed at my family, I love them. No, I’m crazy about them. They are my support, and they love me no matter how much I screw up. I know what you’re thinking, that I seem like a big cry-baby, but I’m really not. I can drop a tear, but I’m not a cry baby.
If anything I think it is good to show emotion. Obviously there can be a point where it is too much emotion and sensitivity, but for the most part, I think it is great when someone can show emotions or at least passion about something. In my defense, I can’t imagine living life and knowing Christ and not at least getting emotional about that. If anything we should be in tears daily for what Christ has done for all of us. After all, Christ death is what brings us to the point that we can face God at all.
No wonder the demon in Mark 1:23-24 cried out to God and said leave us alone. Not only did the demon know Christ and want to live and dwell in the man in the synagogue, but commentators (people who know everything about the Scripture) say that the “us” the demon refers to is all the demons because the demon in the story knew that Jesus can completely wipe every demon out. Isn’t that interesting? The demon cried out to God to basically “save” him and the rest of the demons from Christ. The problem for the demon was that he wanted to be saved, but he didn’t want to follow. So Jesus showed no remorse in verse 25.
I can’t help but think of all the junk in my life and how I cry out for Christ to save me from it but sometimes nothing really happens. This Scripture makes me really think hard about my desires as a Christian. I mean, do I want to be saved, but I am not willing to give up my issues? Isn’t that basically what the demon was wrestling with? He wanted to be saved, but he didn’t really want to turn from what he was doing wrong; making the body he dwelled in become whole.
I was talking with a friend last night who was talking about all the things in his life that he has pursued: women, jobs, money, playing on the lake, etc. but the one thing he never had really pursued until recent was being righteous. What my friend was basically saying is that he wasn’t just going to ask Jesus to “save” him anymore; he wanted Jesus to change him. You know, that is what I want too. I don’t want to just be saved, I want to be changed. I don’t want to be like the demon who knows Christ, I want to be like the one who follows Christ leaving all that "was and is" behind.
As I sit here on my bed, freezing I might add, I can’t help but drop a few more tears. I’m so tired of being “that” guy. You know, the one who acts like he has it all together but doesn’t. The fact of the matter is as much stuff as I feel like I deal with and have dealt with, etc. Christ came to give me peace and hope. He came to give you the same. Whatever you are dealing with, whatever seems to be heavy on your heart now, Christ didn’t just come to save you from it; He came to heal you from it. You don’t have to go to Him, He came to you. So cry out! Christ is there…
One of my favorite bands, Third Day wrote a song, entitled Cry Out To Jesus. It get's me every time, if you know what I mean. Listen to it, (or read it at http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/thirdday/cryouttojesus.html), buy it, and go see them in concert (they are out with Jars of Clay right now)! Here’s their link… http://www.thirdday.com/
Are we still in this together? I don't believe anybody can change on their own. I really don't. We have to have each other and we have to have Christ. Since Christ is already here, I guess I am trying to say, I am here too. See you all soon.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
Trust and Jesus, or Trust Jesus
Hey all, I’m so sorry that it has been awhile since I have written. I have been so busy writing some devotions I am hoping to get published, I was out on the road this weekend preaching, and as most of you know I am working at a church here in Nashville too now. However, I guess busy is good because I’m getting my bills paid, and that is a good thing, right?
As hard as traveling and preaching is, I really love it. I love meeting new people and getting to talk about life. As I was telling the congregation this morning, life is hard and at least for me, I am always sitting around guessing what it all means or is supposed to mean. Recently, my times out preaching have been closer to my home in North Carolina, so I have been able to drive to the places I am going. While driving I get to have a lot of quiet time, which is nice, and I get to stop along the way in random spots and meet even more new people.
It’s funny but when I am out about town, or on the road, it seems to shock people that I am a preacher. I guess they aren’t expecting a preacher to have shaggy hair and be smacking on some sort of gum that is supposed to make his teeth whiter. However, I love it when I am done preaching and people come up to me and talk with me about how they think I defy stereotypes. It seems like people always have something nice to say, but then I usually wonder if they meant it or if they are just being nice.
One of my many issues is that I have a hard time trusting people. Trying to psychoanalyze myself, I think I don’t trust because in the far past I wasn’t as trustworthy as I should have been, and in the recent past the people that I have tried to get close to weren’t as trustworthy as they portrayed themselves either (not everyone, but some). However, the combination of all that makes it hard for me to trust others, and sometimes that even comes out in my trust with God. I like to say I trust God, but I have to ask myself if I really trust God with my life if I don’t fully rest in His promises that He WILL take care of me.
I don’t want to admit this, but sometimes I have a hard time with taking what I read in the Bible and truly believing it. I believe it, but my actions don’t always line up with what I say I believe. For instance, as I just stated, I trust God, but I worry about my life. Those things don’t line up. Or how about this, I read what Jesus says for me to do and I believe it and think it is great, but I don’t do it. I guess the question for me comes then if I truly find Jesus authoritative? If not, then why wouldn’t I obey his command? I mean, when my mom and dad tell me to do something I do it. Why? Because they are an authority in my life.
I read different passages in Mark and I get so frustrated with myself and my life. Jesus was there with them! And to some extent they knew He was different. In Mark 1:21-22, we see where Jesus walked into the temple began preaching and when He was finished the people were astonished at how well He did. He spoke with authority, the people said, and weren’t like the scribes (or the other preachers who read the scrolls). This whole authority thing just gets to me. I mean even earlier in the book of Mark when Jesus walked by Simon, Andrew, James, and John, they left what they were doing immediately to follow Jesus. Did they know that Jesus had some authority? If not, then why would they have left!?
It’s like everybody thus far knew Jesus was different. They didn’t know exactly what it was about Him, but they knew He was different. The way He taught and spoke and lived in other words, commanded attention. Now, honestly I don’t know how that all fits with my whole spill earlier about meeting people and trust, etc., but this is what it boils down to for me. If Jesus has the authority that the people of old portrayed He had, then why don’t we see Jesus as an authoritative person today? If we do, then why don’t we live like it?
I’m not trying to get on to anyone other than myself here. Honestly, I am super busy with work and trying to live this thing called life, and I still have issues when it comes to authority. I wonder if I am so worried about authority and trust because when I seem to let people have some sort of authority over me I end up getting hurt. That has to be it. But here’s the thing Jesus isn’t here to hurt us. If anything He loves us more than we ever could have hoped for or deserved. He’s the one that left the many to come find us, He’s the one that when it came to pay the price for our sin, He did NOT hesitate.
I love you Jesus. Forgive me for not always being who I need to be and trusting in you as I should.
As hard as traveling and preaching is, I really love it. I love meeting new people and getting to talk about life. As I was telling the congregation this morning, life is hard and at least for me, I am always sitting around guessing what it all means or is supposed to mean. Recently, my times out preaching have been closer to my home in North Carolina, so I have been able to drive to the places I am going. While driving I get to have a lot of quiet time, which is nice, and I get to stop along the way in random spots and meet even more new people.
It’s funny but when I am out about town, or on the road, it seems to shock people that I am a preacher. I guess they aren’t expecting a preacher to have shaggy hair and be smacking on some sort of gum that is supposed to make his teeth whiter. However, I love it when I am done preaching and people come up to me and talk with me about how they think I defy stereotypes. It seems like people always have something nice to say, but then I usually wonder if they meant it or if they are just being nice.
One of my many issues is that I have a hard time trusting people. Trying to psychoanalyze myself, I think I don’t trust because in the far past I wasn’t as trustworthy as I should have been, and in the recent past the people that I have tried to get close to weren’t as trustworthy as they portrayed themselves either (not everyone, but some). However, the combination of all that makes it hard for me to trust others, and sometimes that even comes out in my trust with God. I like to say I trust God, but I have to ask myself if I really trust God with my life if I don’t fully rest in His promises that He WILL take care of me.
I don’t want to admit this, but sometimes I have a hard time with taking what I read in the Bible and truly believing it. I believe it, but my actions don’t always line up with what I say I believe. For instance, as I just stated, I trust God, but I worry about my life. Those things don’t line up. Or how about this, I read what Jesus says for me to do and I believe it and think it is great, but I don’t do it. I guess the question for me comes then if I truly find Jesus authoritative? If not, then why wouldn’t I obey his command? I mean, when my mom and dad tell me to do something I do it. Why? Because they are an authority in my life.
I read different passages in Mark and I get so frustrated with myself and my life. Jesus was there with them! And to some extent they knew He was different. In Mark 1:21-22, we see where Jesus walked into the temple began preaching and when He was finished the people were astonished at how well He did. He spoke with authority, the people said, and weren’t like the scribes (or the other preachers who read the scrolls). This whole authority thing just gets to me. I mean even earlier in the book of Mark when Jesus walked by Simon, Andrew, James, and John, they left what they were doing immediately to follow Jesus. Did they know that Jesus had some authority? If not, then why would they have left!?
It’s like everybody thus far knew Jesus was different. They didn’t know exactly what it was about Him, but they knew He was different. The way He taught and spoke and lived in other words, commanded attention. Now, honestly I don’t know how that all fits with my whole spill earlier about meeting people and trust, etc., but this is what it boils down to for me. If Jesus has the authority that the people of old portrayed He had, then why don’t we see Jesus as an authoritative person today? If we do, then why don’t we live like it?
I’m not trying to get on to anyone other than myself here. Honestly, I am super busy with work and trying to live this thing called life, and I still have issues when it comes to authority. I wonder if I am so worried about authority and trust because when I seem to let people have some sort of authority over me I end up getting hurt. That has to be it. But here’s the thing Jesus isn’t here to hurt us. If anything He loves us more than we ever could have hoped for or deserved. He’s the one that left the many to come find us, He’s the one that when it came to pay the price for our sin, He did NOT hesitate.
I love you Jesus. Forgive me for not always being who I need to be and trusting in you as I should.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
ready BUT not prepared
I think I have been able to move past the last hard word we got through reading in Mark. However, it has taken me some time to really think about it and be able to move on with the event that took place. My mom reads my blog each time and so it is always interesting to hear what she has to say and after this last blog she reminded me that life isn’t about me, or her, or for that matter John the Baptist. The Christian Life is about working to bring honor to God and living in a way that whatever happens and whenever stuff happens we are ready for it.
Well, as we read on in Mark 1:16-20 we find where the first four disciples (Simon, Andrew, James, and John) were called to follow Jesus. In Mark’s account of all this he doesn’t tell the details of their call, but rather shows us that they were called and that they responded immediately to Jesus. Not only did they just leave their jobs and responsibilities, James and John left their father there at the sea shore with the help.
Some of you may not know this about me, but before I was a preacher, I was an accountant. I had felt the urging to be in the ministry at a very young age, but the truth was, at least for me, that most other preachers I knew of were not the kind of people I wanted to grow up to be. Furthermore, my dad was in Christian music, and I didn’t want to do that – I wanted to make my own way.
So, I did the logical thing, I ran as fast as I could away from the professional ministry. After-all I didn’t see myself like all the other future “preacher” boys for I felt like I was cool! I realize now, I am, and was, not. Haha! But I say all this to say, it was very difficult for me to leave what I thought I could do on my own, and I felt like I could do a lot. And honestly, I could, but I wasn’t happy on my own apart from being and doing what God had planned for me. I knew what it was I was supposed to do with my life, but I was too prideful to be in the ministry; I was too good to be a Christian; I was too cool to hang out with people who didn’t party how I wanted; and, I enjoyed too much junk to make as little money as ministers make. (At least that was my mindset.)
But it’s funny how Christ works. I became so miserable with where I was in life, all I wanted to do was leave my job to follow what it was I thought Christ wanted me to do at an early age: be a preacher. I remember like it was yesterday, telling my parents that I wasn’t happy, only to quit my job a few days later and beginning seminary the following week. They thought I was nuts for quitting my job, and I was, but what is interesting for me, is that I was ready like the disciples seemed to be in our story. Here’s the thing though. I was ready, but I wasn’t prepared.
I wonder if the disciples were ready for what was about to come in their life. Were they miserable and ready for change? We won’t ever know the answer to that, but I do know I wasn’t prepared. I didn’t read my Bible daily, and it’s hard for me to do that now; my lifestyle up to that point wasn’t the most “Christian” of lifestyles (if you know what I mean); I wasn’t ready to fit the status quo of Christianity; and, I still wrestled and continue wrestling, with wanting to please myself rather than please God.
Through all my insecurities, my doubts, and all the tough times I have faced, so far in my life, I still am not prepared. Like John (the one we just read about who ended up being beheaded) I am not, and get this, you are not worthy of tying his sandal strap. However, Jesus didn’t come for us to tie his shoe, but came to tie ours (metaphorically speaking). How humbling it is to think that Jesus only says “come follow me,” and how comforting it is to know that He will take care of all the rest. No matter our education, our faults, our fears, our inequities, our reputations, or our family’s reputation Christ will and can use you and he can use me despite those things. And better than anything, where we are weak, He makes us strong (2 Corinthians 12:10)!
All Jesus asks us to do is come and follow him on this journey. Like any journey or vacation, it is much more fun to have people to share all the excitement with, so let’s continue making this journey together. You still excited? I am, and right now I am pretty humbled too that Jesus would even want me and you to come along.
Well, as we read on in Mark 1:16-20 we find where the first four disciples (Simon, Andrew, James, and John) were called to follow Jesus. In Mark’s account of all this he doesn’t tell the details of their call, but rather shows us that they were called and that they responded immediately to Jesus. Not only did they just leave their jobs and responsibilities, James and John left their father there at the sea shore with the help.
Some of you may not know this about me, but before I was a preacher, I was an accountant. I had felt the urging to be in the ministry at a very young age, but the truth was, at least for me, that most other preachers I knew of were not the kind of people I wanted to grow up to be. Furthermore, my dad was in Christian music, and I didn’t want to do that – I wanted to make my own way.
So, I did the logical thing, I ran as fast as I could away from the professional ministry. After-all I didn’t see myself like all the other future “preacher” boys for I felt like I was cool! I realize now, I am, and was, not. Haha! But I say all this to say, it was very difficult for me to leave what I thought I could do on my own, and I felt like I could do a lot. And honestly, I could, but I wasn’t happy on my own apart from being and doing what God had planned for me. I knew what it was I was supposed to do with my life, but I was too prideful to be in the ministry; I was too good to be a Christian; I was too cool to hang out with people who didn’t party how I wanted; and, I enjoyed too much junk to make as little money as ministers make. (At least that was my mindset.)
But it’s funny how Christ works. I became so miserable with where I was in life, all I wanted to do was leave my job to follow what it was I thought Christ wanted me to do at an early age: be a preacher. I remember like it was yesterday, telling my parents that I wasn’t happy, only to quit my job a few days later and beginning seminary the following week. They thought I was nuts for quitting my job, and I was, but what is interesting for me, is that I was ready like the disciples seemed to be in our story. Here’s the thing though. I was ready, but I wasn’t prepared.
I wonder if the disciples were ready for what was about to come in their life. Were they miserable and ready for change? We won’t ever know the answer to that, but I do know I wasn’t prepared. I didn’t read my Bible daily, and it’s hard for me to do that now; my lifestyle up to that point wasn’t the most “Christian” of lifestyles (if you know what I mean); I wasn’t ready to fit the status quo of Christianity; and, I still wrestled and continue wrestling, with wanting to please myself rather than please God.
Through all my insecurities, my doubts, and all the tough times I have faced, so far in my life, I still am not prepared. Like John (the one we just read about who ended up being beheaded) I am not, and get this, you are not worthy of tying his sandal strap. However, Jesus didn’t come for us to tie his shoe, but came to tie ours (metaphorically speaking). How humbling it is to think that Jesus only says “come follow me,” and how comforting it is to know that He will take care of all the rest. No matter our education, our faults, our fears, our inequities, our reputations, or our family’s reputation Christ will and can use you and he can use me despite those things. And better than anything, where we are weak, He makes us strong (2 Corinthians 12:10)!
All Jesus asks us to do is come and follow him on this journey. Like any journey or vacation, it is much more fun to have people to share all the excitement with, so let’s continue making this journey together. You still excited? I am, and right now I am pretty humbled too that Jesus would even want me and you to come along.
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